Apart from my personal problems, I find every day a person unknown hitherto trying to hurt my sentiments. I swear, a day before I went to watch a movie for simple entertainment. Hero of the movie was so unkind that he made mockery of my caste by smearing three vertical lines on his forehead, and yet seen debauching. He was shown to have been licking his fingers after eating sumptuous non vegetarian meal which is a taboo in my cast. Yet another case of ridicule was found in one movie not long ago when one of my three million gods has incarnated as a buffoon though I was not quite definite with the characteristics of this god, I surfed through internet for authenticity to protest for this kind of deprecation.
Recent power packed speeches by our regional leaders made me conscious of my accent and surprisingly I found that every where it had been distorted in the name of sophistication . Why the heck I should mend my accent when I have to be formal? They say that this language format has been used in books. Who wrote these books? It is not my caste people who wrote these heavy books and bothered us to learn them. Even before I forget let me tell you I found my accent frequently been used by villains and goondas in many movies which is derogatory. Do you suggest any kind of treachery behind it? How come I was ignorant of this fact for so long?
I cheered up to my favorite bats man every time he hit his century but he really seemed to have failed in understanding my sentiment about my city when he declared it to be open for every Tom Dick and Harry who flock here to plunder all of 'our' people. Though ungracious I would like to question his propriety in doing so. Same is the case with Big C who came here like a pauper and made his millions. I demand that he should cough his millions to develop my city. By the way am I wrong in saying so? After all it is we who made him rich. So in a way it is our money. So there nothing wrong even if I demand a chunk of land from him.
As if I have few problems, Government of India has declared an award for a book which I hardly cared before. But I followed a discussion on television which ultimately divulged it's true nature of being very atheistic and vulgar. How responsible government can ignore the fact that this kind of books wound our sentiments? Years of people's ignorance and carelessness has resulted in number increase in atheists, who don't hesitate to insult our epic heroes or heroines. I think government should not stop with ripping him of his award alone but also punish him for being so disrespectful to our culture. Although I have never been traditional, celebrate festivals, I think I am very conscious of my culture. My wife nags for my bed tea and lunch before bath, yet I believe I am born with culture.
I have become increasingly irritant with my neighbor who revealed his Lahore roots. "Are you Pakistani?" "No, no we are Hindus, and we migrated during partition". Whatever, he is still a Pakistani to me. I cautioned my children to be away from theirs. My heart tells me that he is not Indian though he is Hindu. Why every body comes to India as if we are not enough here? I suspect that my brother-in-law did not get his job due to severe competition from these ' settlers'.
I felt guilty that I switched off my T.V. while my children watch a movie promo this morning. They say it is historical. I apprehend that history is full of blunders. My community has been shown as monsters few centuries ago depriving some other community their basic rights. How can it be true? I heard a great lot about their valor. What other communities think of us if they watch this movie? I want to consult a lawyer so that he can bring a ban on this movie. It may cost me some money. So what? Should we not spend that much for the sake of community?
On my way to the lawyer there stood a giant statue of Einstein. He was shining and grabbing every body's attention. Municipal people might have cleaned bird's excreta covering it. What this man is doing here all these years? Is he is Indian? More importantly is he Hindu? No way. Why not I include this clause in my petition to bring this statue down? My ignorant lawyer asked me what the statue got to do with my community case. I thought a while and told him "It is irreligious to erect a Christian statue in Hindu dominated street"
My wife acted rudly with me refusing to part with her bangles towards the lawyer fees and slammed on my face "You better go the forest and live there where you are not in contact with people, books, television or movies and your sentiments are secure."
"Don't you ever dare to question me, you North Indians ever allow us to live in peace?"I freaked out.
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